We talk to ourselves incessantly about our world. In fact we maintain our world with our internal talk. And whenever we finish talking to ourselves about ourselves and our world, the world is always as it should be. We renew it, we rekindle it with life, we uphold it with our internal talk. Not only that, but we also choose our paths as we talk to ourselves. Thus we repeat the same choices over and over until the day we die, because we keep on repeating the same internal talk over and over until the day we die. A warrior is aware of this and strives to stop his internal talk.
~ Carlos Castaneda
For some reason, I'm compelled to expand on my prior post.
Mainly about the idea of how we treat ourselves on a daily basis and how that treatment relates to how we treat others and the kinds of relationships we have in our lives.
Being a person who has struggled with negative self talk for many, many years, it's only recently I've realized just how powerful that kind of dialogue can be. It kind of ties into a lot of the other posts I've had.
So, I challenge you to wake up tomorrow, just one day, give it one day and take a thought inventory. By this I mean, simply listen to yourself, listen to your mind's constant chatter, which most of us don't pay much attention to, despite those thought trains that are running many of our lives.
Examples, do you wake up and see the life inside you when you look in the mirror? The steady rise and fall of your chest as you take in breath? The feeling of your heart beating, the ultimate symbol of self love — first nourishing itself before nourishing the rest of the body?
Or do you see your flaws, perhaps some gray hairs or age lines, your scars, the extra weight you've been trying to get off, the aches and pains. Then you get ready for the day, maybe you don't like what you're wearing and how it looks on you, maybe you're already thinking about all the things you have to get done, how much is on your list, how unhappy your are with certain things in your life, how you wish things were different, etc.
All that dialogue happens before you're even out the door. Then throw in interactions with other humans, your job, maybe your significant other. Pay attention to how you talk to yourself all day, do you constantly think about how fruitless your efforts seem to be? Your insecurities? Do you think about how lonely you are or how unhappy you are with the person you're with? Maybe how you feel underappreciated by people, like you just can't do enough or be enough. Then you start comparing yourself to other people or wonder "what do they have that I don't?"
How often do we TRULY think positive thoughts throughout our daily dialogue? How often are we actually NICE to ourselves? And how imbalanced are those numbers when compared to the negative thoughts?
As Antoine Rivarol says, “Speech is external thought, and thought internal speech.”
The converse side is the power of dialogue can be just as strong on the other end of the spectrum, when transformed, when changed into uplifting thoughts, into "light at the end of the tunnel" thoughts, into forgiving thoughts.
I've been exposing at times about some of the things I've been through or situations I've been in or allowed to happen to me, dating back to my teen years. How I've had very diverse relationships or friendships over the years, changing my faux identity to fit each one ... and how I've had some very similar ones as well, patterns, etc.
Well, the truth is, it all comes back to how I treat myself. Do I respect my body just as it is right now in this moment? Or am I constantly wanting it to change? Do I respect my heart and my soul or am I constantly masking things, putting up pretenses, beating myself down, manipulating myself, etc.?
And how can I expect others not to do the same to me?
Think of yourself, think of all the things you're unhappy about and then pause for a moment and ask yourself what and when was the last nice thing you thought or said about yourself?
I've been in the process of changing that dialogue for some time now. My counselor really got me going on that path, but then everything else that's come along has been aiding me.
I implore those who read to do the same. You'll likely be surprised how out of whack your inner language is. And it might just explain how you treat others and allow yourself to be treated.
I'd love some feedback.