Pale September

Pale September/I wore the time like a dress that year/The autumn days swung soft around me/Like cotton on my skin ... and all my armour falling down in a pile at my feet ~ Fiona Apple

As those closest to me know Fiona Apple is my favorite female solo artist on this planet. Now, considering I have a deep admiration for many female solo artists -- including Bjork, Tori Amos, Aimee Mann, Kate Nash, Sarah McLachlan, Loreena McKennitt, Neko Case and more recently, Kristin Hersh -- to say she is my favorite is quite powerful. She takes a box of ivory keys and creates melodic poetry, sung with such depth and soul, you feel as though you're listening to her from her insides. Yes, much of her music is often melancholy, tranquil, mournful or just plain jaded, but she also has many uplifting gems in the mix, such as the one quoted above.

"Pale September" is one of my favorite songs by her and especially at this time of year, for more than obvious reasons. Fiona is also my favorite lyricists. Her songs are rich, poetic and always resonate with me, especially on rainy nights like tonight ...

Reflection has fell upon me. I'm swaying backward today. I've been delving into memories leading up to today ... good ones, bad ones, ugly ones, beautiful ones. And as the leaves begin to change and the smell of autumn filled my lungs, I let out a deep, rhythmic sigh, feeling my insides swell with emotion that reached to the farthest corners of the spectrum. Most days, I know what to do with those memories ... but today, I do not. I'm not quite sure what to do with them all, just that they're there, breathing me slowly in and out, like a shadow in the darkness.

I also feel ripped open this week. But the slits aren't all bad, they just hurt. As my best friend told me a few nights ago, "It's good when you're offered different perspectives on things or called out on things, but what's important is that someone is there to remind you right after just how amazing a person you are just as you are." And she did, as have others. And I felt a little less heavy. Because I think we all should be given new perspectives once in awhile. I think it's important to be shown our flaws, albeit, gently shown. But yes, it is good to have someone there to remind you how, even if a single bone in your body never changes, you've still got things to offer.

And if nothing more, all I could ask of those reading ... is to tell someone, right now, this very moment, what they mean. Because, speaking from experience, randomness sometimes hits the hardest.

So, with that, I'll let Fiona carry it away ...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aqLdAGJbk_U

Pale September
I wore the time
Like a dress that year
The autumn days
Swung soft around me
Like cotton on my skin

But as the embers
Of the summer
Lost their breath
And disappearred
My heart went cold and
Only hollow rhythms
Resounded from within

But then he rose
Brilliant as the moon in full
And sank in the
Burrows of my keep
And all my armour
Falling down
In a pile at my feet
And my winter giving
Way to warm
As I'm singing him to sleep

He goes along just
As a water lily
Gentle on the surface
Of his thoughts
His body floats
Unweighed down by
Passion or intensity
Yet unaware of the
Depth upon which he coasts
And he finds a home in me
For what misfortune sows
He knows my touch will reap

And all my armour
Falling down
In a pile at me feet
And my winter giving
Way to warm
As I'm singing him to sleep
All my armour
Falling down
In a pile at my feet
And my winter giving
Way to warm
As I'm singing him to sleep

~C~